Its been a LOOOONG time since I blogged.
And tonight I feel like blogging again. A lot has been happening in my life in the past one month.
Most importantly, National Service.
I've realized more things about myself and learnt a lot in these past few weeks than I've learnt in the in the past few months. Army life has been an eye opener for me.
People have always told me how army life is a waste of time, how it sucks away your precious social life etc etc.
I honestly dont feel any of that.
Army is fun.
Straight up. Its Freaking fun! I enjoy every minute of it. This may sound like bullshit, but hear me out.
Army has taught me how to accept changes in your life and take them into stride, and perform to the best of your abilities, no matter the situation. Everyday is another challenge for me. Getting up, doing PT, marching, learning new things about being a soldier, more PT and then more learning.
But every day I wake up with only one thought in my mind: Today's Yoga will be better than yesterday's Yoga. Today I will break yesterday's standards. Today I will set new standards for myself.
Everyday I force myself to run faster, push harder and climb higher than I did the day before. Its a challenge to me, a chance to push my limits.
And being a Commando recruit, your limits get higher and higher each day.
My first IPPT test, I ran my 2.4km in 9mins 54 secs. I've never run that fast in my life. And i thought I would never run that fast again.
2 days ago I ran again... 8 mins 53 secs. Seeing that drastic improvement made me realize how much Ive been pushing myself, how much my endurance has risen. Im proud of myself. I am. I wont deny it. Its one of those few rare opportunities in life where I can look myself in the mirror and say: Good Job Dude!
But more than anything, I'm proud of my fellow soldiers, people who cant run, who cant push, but they refuse to give up, refuse to let pain affect them. People who believe in mind over matter.
The old army saying: You make your best buddies in BMT is true. Suffering together, pushing each other, motivating each other has brought me and my bunkmates close together to the point where it seems like I've known them for years, even though we've only known each other for 4 weeks.
Learning how to motivate each other and take care of each other is something I take away with me when I leave camp every week. What the Army has thought me, I apply.
My sergeants have taught me the best way to lead people is not by screaming at them like dogs, making us do pushups and torturing us. It's by treating each and every person around you as an equal, as a man. As someone who is responsible and mature, irregardless their age, background and race. Thats the way they treat us.
Give respect and take respect.
I've gotten back in touch with my Dad, talking to him a lot when I have the chance. It no longer feels like a father son talk, but more of a friend to friend talk. I want to have more of this talks with him, even though my weekends are so limited.
But one negative thing about the Army is how it has freaked up my body clock. Nowadays, no matter what time I sleep, i still automatically get up at 530am, and I cant go back to bed.
So forgive me if I seem tired or worn out. I just need a bit more adjusting.
But on the overall, I love NS life. Why must I hate it?
I'd rather learn to love the next 2 years of my life than bitch and moan about it. You just have to look at the positive side of things.
For my AFT:
Tonight was a really great night guys. I had a load of fun with you guys, hanging out at Vivo, playing board games and listening to that crazy ride back home.
If I seemed tired or out of it for the past few weeks, its not cos I am 'step' cool or whatever. Im just tired. But I try my best to be lively around you guys. Its not that hard. You guys cheer me up everytime. EVERYTIME.
Every night, I stand at the railing of barracks and from where I am, I can see all the way across the island to the City. I can see places like Hougang and Punggol. Its beautiful, being able to see civillisation from camp.
My only gripe is that I cant see all the way back to Sembawang. Back to home.
This may sound mushy, but Im just gonna say it.
Knowing Im going to see you guys on the weekends is what keeps me going through the week. Every night I go to sleep, I know its another day closer to hanging out with you guys. I do miss you guys while Im in camp. Its hard not to.
You spend the better part of the past 2 years with people who you treat and love like family and suddenly you only get to see them for a day in a week? Its hard.
Thats why the moment I book out of camp, I rush back home to change and go out to the CC to see you guys. Walking from the MRT station to the CC is nostalgic to say the least. The thousand and one walks we've had there, the nonsense we've done, the shows we've put up...
Maybe most of you dont understand it, but to me, it really brightens my day up when I walk into the Theatrette and I see all of you all there, doing what you guys love doing best, and suddenly, it seems like old times again.
Some wise dude once said Absence make the heart grow fonder. It really does. Even though I dont seem like I miss you guys, just know that I am happy as F*** to see you all. Screw BF2. I'd rather just sit there and just watch you guys perform for hours. Its like therapy. It motivates me. It energizes me and preps me for another week of hard pushing.
Tonight was one of those nights I wont forget for months to come. Im going to take back the letter with me back to camp and pin it up on my mirror. So every night before I go to sleep, I can take a look at it, and go to bed with a smile on my lips knowing somewhere far off across the isalnd, I have people I truly care for waiting for me.
People who I call my family.
PS: Im going to break the Commando 2.4 km timing record before my BMT ends... And Im going to do it for you guys...
